According to the MBTI (Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator), I am an ENFJ. An extrovert, energized by being around and interacting with other people. It is important to remember that one is not completely one or the other, introvert or extrovert on the MBTI, just one more than the other. I consider myself a pragmatic extrovert. What is that you may ask? Well, I am energized by interacting with people I feel comfortable around, and I have cultivated the ability to "fake it til I make it" when I'm around people who threaten or intimidate me. Some people and many social situations really drain me, drain my energy.
I can be very shy, and I am selective about how much I reveal about myself. I definitely cultivate a public persona.
When I started this blog, I wanted a place to express myself, and to share and exchange with like-minded people. I worried about whether I was getting myself into something that I would regret. Would viewers challenge me on what I express? Would anyone target me with malice? Would I be opening myself up too much just to gain common understanding of a few?
I can also be very shy about having my picture taken. And by "shy" here, I mean vain. I can honestly say that I believe myself to be prettier than I am. You know those comparison pictures used to illustrate the discrepancy between reality and perception for a person who suffers body dysmorphia? I have that in the opposite way. My self-image is way more flattering than the lies that cameras and mirrors reveal to me. It may be shallow, but I want to be beautiful. So I use cameras and mirrors sparingly. That is why there are at this time only 2 images I have posted of myself on the internet. (I can't help any that others have posted on FB on TBT from our high school yearbook.)
I took a face selfie for my FB page. It was so hard to do. I did my hair and makeup, chose my lighting, took lots of different selfies. I wonder if I would have photoshopped my dark circles and wrinkles if I knew how. I chose one, cropped it, and posted it on my profile. I cringe when I see it. That was about 2 years ago. The second photo is the one heading up my last post. My husband took it. I made him take a few shots at different angles. I am wearing no makeup, but I'm quite obscured by bike helmet, sunglasses and even earmuffs. But even still, I cringe. There is no camouflaging my overweight body and chubby cheeks.
Why am I putting myself through this? Because I think it is part of a journey to improving my physical and mental health. It is said that to be effective in setting and reaching goals, it is important to define where you are and where you want to go. So, that photo is a starting line of sorts, and the starting line of the PMC will be a finishing line of sorts. I am going to try to document my journey here.
On Monday, I started Dr Phil's 20/20 diet and took a bike ride, did some resistance work at YMCA. Tuesday, I took a Deep Water Fitness class at the Y. The weather took a turn to colder and windier, so no bike ride; yesterday I exerted myself shampooing carpets. I have already lost a couple of pounds, am generally more active around the house. My muscles are complaining a little (okay, a lot), so I'm drinking lots more water, and doing stretches and even taking a little acetaminophen as needed.
I will try to blog other things too, so as not to bore you too much with this journey Balance is good!
Hey, for fun, if you have stopped in today and ever taken the MBTI, will you comment with what personality type you are?
3 comments:
Hi Wendy,
I enjoyed seeing the photo of you in your last post and thought you very attractive (what I could see with the bicycle helmet). Good for you for moving forward with your health.
I'm an INTJ and love being alone. I like people, but I definitely recharge on my own.
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